Will iPhone 6 Make It Easier to Lose ALL Your Stuff at Once?

For whatever reason, people really get their knickers in a twist for new iPhone releases. In addition to said knicker-twisting comes a flurry of rumors and assorted BS about what will or won’t be included in the newest mediocre-at-best device with an expensive logo on the back. One of the “hottest” rumors about the iPhone 6, set to be unveiled on September 9, is a “mobile wallet” feature.

Convenient My Eye

Apple has reportedly finalized a deal with American Express that will allow iPhone 6ers to pay for goods and services with their phones, rather than those pesky, bulky credit and debit cards people have been using like so many cavemen. (And what is this “cash” of which you speak?) Similar deals with Visa and MasterCard are supposedly in the works, as well.

This all sounds well and good, until one thinks about it for more than two seconds. The most obvious problem is that this makes it even more attractive for thieves to steal your phone—sure, there would be safety precautions in place, but we all know those only go so far. Hackers bust into people’s phones now just for shiggles; imagine what they’d do if there was money to be stolen.

Second: how many retailers will realistically be ready to accept iPhone’d payments? Some credit cards give users the option to just tap their card on a payment device (rather than sliding it through because gods forbid we have to more our arms or something—what exactly is the benefit there?), but retailers with compatible pay stations are few and far between, though it’s a far-from-new development.

Many businesses have a hard enough time getting their cash registers—for all their high-tech bells and whistles—to accept digital coupons that customers receive via email or text. How dependable will an iPhone pay system be? And how long will it take before employees at iPhone-payment friendly businesses are even remotely aware of how to process those payments? My guess is, for every successful payment, there will be at least fifty that don’t work properly and the customer will just have to bust out their actual human wallet anyway.

Rumors that the iPhone 6 would be a flip phone are, unfortunately, untrue.

Rumors that the iPhone 6 would be a flip phone are, unfortunately, untrue.

Just Because It’s Possible Doesn’t Mean It’s Necessary

Sure, every new technology has to start somewhere. And Apple is a big enough player that they could eventually bring this kind of “convenience” to the forefront. But is this really something the world needs? Is it really such an inconvenience to pay for stuff with cash or a card? Either way, you’re taking something out of your pocket, messing with it, and receiving the goods/services you were looking for. Does it matter what you’re taking out of your pocket?

And if you think carrying a separate, actual wallet (or just cash/cards) is that much of a hassle, you probably shouldn’t be allowed in public anyway. Not everything needs to be “mobile” or “digital,” you lazy hipsters. And I’ve never seen a real, physical wallet that wasn’t mobile.

Technology can be so damn stupid.

Photo credit: shellingz / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

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