Google Conquers Twitch in $1B Combat, Further Expands Empire

Google, proving itself once again to be the mightiest empire in internet history, has claimed victory in battle over the streaming video game service of Twitch. Led by General Anton von Google, and reporting a war budget of $1 billion, Google finally defeated Twitch late last week after months of protracted and intense speculation.

Over 45M Monthly Viewers Now Pay Fealty to Google

In adding the conquered web service’s lands and holdings to their ever expanding empire, Google won a new audience of over 45 million monthly viewers. Despite earlier, unsubstantiated reports of continuing resistance from the citizens of Twitch, it is now confirmed that over 80 percent of users have bent the knee and sworn allegiance to their new ruler. The remainder are expected to follow suit in due time.

Twitch is dead. Long live Twitch.

Twitch is dead. Long live Twitch.

Twitch of Google, as it will now be known, allows video game players to stream live and upload game footage from their gaming devices. PC, PS4, and Xbox One are all supported. Prior to its annexation, Twitch claimed more than one million individual broadcasters, while the average visitor to the realm spends roughly 106 minutes there per day.

Good for the Realm; Good for the Conquered?

The Battle of Twitch will likely be remembered as one of Google’s greatest victories. Google used similar tactics, at a similar cost, to defeat YouTube in 2006. The then-fledgling video streaming realm has now become the single largest site of its kind in the known world.

While the downfall of an independent YouTube ultimately proved to be beneficial to both conqueror and conquered, not all those who’ve fallen to the Google Empire have fared as well.

In May of this year, Google annexed the restaurant website design realm of Appetas for at least fifty bucks. Google promptly shuttered the entire land. However, substantial recent growth in the Twitch suggests that the Empire would continue to maintain and grow their newly attained lands. Twitch played host to Valve’s Dota 2 Tournament, which offered a champions’ purse of $10 million, up from just $3 million at last year’s tournament.

Clearly there are many a party interested in the exports of Twitch of Google. And certainly the Empire has the ways and means to foster their latest conquest to a new position of strength in the realm.

Photo credit: theglobalpanorama / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)

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